Actress: Food fight!
Bishop: Ha ha! He seems to be the victim of a drive-by spaghetti-ing.
Actress: Yes, complete with the bread rolls stuck to his head. How very authentic.
Bishop: It’s an Italian food monster.
Actress: This is making me hungry. I love Italian food, don’t you?
Bishop: Yes, I do! And he’s got it in spades. Ironically, he’s the one eating everyone.
Actress: If he can cook, I might have to marry him instead, baby….
Bishop: Noooo!! I will fight IT for your love!
Actress: You are my hero… *flutters eyelashes*
Bishop: *Puffs up chest*
Actress: He probably smells like processed parmesan anyway. That stuff stinks like vomit.
Bishop: I don’t even think it’s food, I think it’s some horrible Yarn Monster
Actress: A knitting monster! If he can knit, I might have to marry him instead, baby ….
Bishop: D’oh! Would you please stop fawning over movie monsters? You also threatened to leave me for the Creature From the Black Lagoon, and my ego can’t take anymore.
Actress: Oh, women can be so cruel… Speaking of which, why is it that frightened women on movie posters are always lying terrified, in a comely position, in pretty matching underwear?
Bishop: Women only get attacked while in a partial state of undress.
Actress: Yeah, that’d be right… *rolls eyes*
Bishop: He must have an enormous appetite. How does he put it all away? I mean, if he can eat some people, that’s one thing, but to eat EVERYBODY? He’s going to have a belly ache….
Actress: I think he’s a bit like cookie monster. Not much of what he was eating ended up in his belly.
Bishop: Ah! He’s really just mashing everybody into his face, while not consuming much of anything.
Actress: Yes, that’s it. It’s veins, arteries and intestines he’s covered in, not spaghetti.
Bishop: Yuck. Do you still want to marry him?
Actress: No, I think you’ll do. You smell nicer.
Bishop: Why thank you.
Actress: I love the obligatory flying saucer with regulation green ray of light in the background.
Bishop: We can assume he is of alien origin…Unless that’s not really a UFO, but a stage light. I think he’s on Broadway.
Actress: No, he must be from Mars. Only Martians have flying saucers with green rays of light.
Actress: This film has a stellar cast, I have to say…
Bishop: Yeah… this cast has some Oscar-caliber names.
Bishop: And I’d just like to add that this could very well be a parody of a cheesy sci-fi movie and not actually a cheesy sci-fi movie and IT DOESN’T MATTER. We’re still making fun of it as if it were genuine.
Actress: Hmm… good point, baby. It could well be a fake, but it’s still a cracker, either way.
Bishop: Speaking of crackers, I’m kind of hungry. This poster is making me crave pasta.
Actress: Me too. Wanna go eat?
Bishop: It always gets back to food. I nominate we break and get something to eat.
Actress: Yes, lets. Your turn to cook…