Far-Out Flicks vol. IV

8th plague

Bishop: Revenge of the sorority lumberjacks!
Actress: I think she’s been hard at it, too. That blade looks a tad blunt.
Bishop: Yeah, she must be exhausted after all that lumberjacking. I had no ideas trees were so bloody…
Actress: It’s a hard life, workin’ on the chain gang… blood, sweat and grumpy looks…
Bishop: Yeah, grumpy’s a good word for it. She doesn’t look scary, only slightly miffed.
Actress: I think she’s grumpy because daddy took away her cell phone.
Bishop: That’s no excuse to kill him with a dull axe.
Actress: I’d probably kill my father if he named me “Hell”…
Bishop: Ha ha! That’s too funny! Oh, tragic to be a girl named Hell…
Actress: No wonder she’s so pissed off…
Bishop: It’s good that she still believes in us, though. No matter what happens, Hell believes in you.
Actress: I find that strangely comforting. Is that wrong?
Bishop: No. No, Hell hasn’t lost her faith. She’s such a good friend.
Bishop: I picture the class valedictorian giving the graduation speech: “And when no one else believed in me, Hell believed in me!”
Actress: [cue: class throw hats in the air]
Bishop: *sniff, sniff*
Actress: That blood will be a bastard to get out of that shirt. This film ought to be sponsored by a good drycleaner, or at the very least a decent brand of washing powder.
Bishop: Yes, Tide needs to feature Hell in a TV commercial.
Bishop
: I’m rusty on my biblical history. Was the 8th plague when the waters turned to red tempra paint?
Actress: Um, yes? No? Fuck, I don’t know. She’s annoying me now. Spoilt cheerleaders tend to have that effect…
Bishop: Shall we move on? Hell needs time alone to sulk and clean herself up.
Actress: Leave her to it, I say…. and without dodgy one-liners about seeing me IN Hell.. thank you. *wink*

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4 Comments

Filed under Far-Out Flicks

4 responses to “Far-Out Flicks vol. IV

  1. I thought your blog name “SexyCoolSuperSpy” was some spam blog. But your comment wasn’t the usual spam so I checked out your blog . Glad I did! LOL You sure can make a horror movie sound funny. I’m not sure if that’s the intent of the director. 🙂

  2. Ivan – Thanks for visiting. No, we’re not a spam blog, and I’m glad you picked that up from my comment. Had I encouraged you to try free Viagra or give me your credit card number, you might not be here now. I should make it a point not to do that.

    Hopefully the directors of the films we lampoon know enough not to take themselves seriously. Right?

    – Bishop

  3. findittmusic

    Thanks for the comment…

  4. findittmusic – No problem. 🙂

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